Friends

I have been hanging out with my two closest friends. Brittiny and Tiffany are biracial identical twins. Chapter 14, “50 Experiences of Racially Mixed People” in our book Readings for Diversity and Social Justice prompted me to ask my friends if they had experienced some of the same statements outlined in the chapter. We went through all fifty statements together and I recorded their responses. I thought going the statements would take maybe an hour, but we ended up talking about their experiences for almost three hours last night.  They gave me permission to share some of their experiences. Their mother is a strawberry blonde, blue eyed white woman; while their dad was (recently deceased) a very dark skinned African American man.

Tiffany Watson and Brittiny Watson

1. Both Brittiny and Tiffany stated they have never been told, “You have to choose; you can’t be both.”
2. They have both been mistakenly identified as Puerto Rican, Hispanic, and other ethnicities.
3. Brittiny said she has had people assume her race to be different on the phone than in person. Tiffany said she never experienced that or maybe she just didn’t realize it.
4. They both said people have told them, “You can’t be white because you’re too dark, but you don’t act black enough.”
5. Both have been told how beautiful mixed raced people are.
6. Brittiny said people often ask if they were adopted.
7. They both said when they straighten their hair people don’t think they look black, but when they wear is naturally curly they are told they look black because they have “nappy” hair.
8. Both women have been asked, “What are you?”
9. Brittiny said white people will tell black jokes and often black people tell them white jokes.
10. They frequently get asked, “Where are you from?”
11. They are often started at, especially Tiffany when she wears her hair straightened.
12. They have both been told, “You look exotic.”  Brittiny said that statement usually comes from perverted men.
13. They have never felt their choice of friends has been interpreted as “selling out” because our friends are all different races and a large portion are mixed.
14. They have been accused of “acting or wanting to white,” from African American friend’s parents.
15. Tiffany is dating my cousin, Brad. Our Grandfather asked Brad, “Does she act black?” Which in Tiffany’s opinion was a judgment about her racial authenticity based on the fact my cousin is white.
16. They both said people make comments all the time about their hair and skin color, but it is usually positive so they don’t mind.
17. Brittiny said some of her coworkers joke around calling her “half-breed” and “mutt”.
18. They have been told from African American’s, “You think you’re too good for your own kind.” Tiffany said with whites, they either accept us or ignore our existence.
19. Brittiny and Tiffany experienced a lot of abusive statements and action from their maternal grandmother because of their racial identity. They were called “nigger babies” and were locked in a closet, while their mother was at work.
20. Their parents never “claim” them for their own racial or ethnic group.
21. Tiffany said, “I feel I kind of do get the best of both worlds, because I am allowed to view both white and black culture.
22. Of course, both women have been asked about their racial and/or ethnicity.
23. They have never had anyone act confused about their last name, which is Watson. Brittany said, "You know all black last names are really white last names."
24. People do assume they struggle with figuring out their racial identity.
25. People have come to up to both of the women speaking Spanish, assuming they are Hispanic.
26. They have been told society does not recognized mixed race. This view is very prevalent to them, when they are required to fill out official forms that only allow them to select one race.
27. They have both been told, “You aren’t really black.”
28. They have been mistaken for a different racial and ethnical group.
29. They have not been told they must be full of self loathing because of the way they identify their race.
30. Brittiny said she has been told she is a mistake. Tiffany does not believe anyone has ever actually said it, but she did feel like some people thought it.
31. They are assumed to be the race of the group of people they are hanging out with at the time. If they with predominately African American’s they are consider African American, but when they hang out with my family they are assumed to be white.
32. N/A
33. They both have difficultly filling out forms.
34. They identified themselves as “mulatto” but most people do not even consider that as a racial classification.
35. They are often told, “You are not like other blacks.”
36. Most of their siblings identify has being a mixed race.
37. They have not been called racial slurs from other racial groups, but certainly have been called racial slurs for both “white” and “black”.
38. They have both been told by a few friends, they should only date African American’s.
39. Their parents identified their race as “mulatto”
40. They have been told, “You are not black enough.”
41. When they first moved to Bastrop, people thought their mother was either there babysitter or they were adopted.
42. Strangers have never assumed their father was their “older boyfriend”.
43. They were treated differently by their maternal grandparents, than their older sister who is also mixed, but has more “white” features.
44. When they were in high school, they were very well liked by most of the guys, but were never asked out on dates.
45. They do not wish to be darker, they like the color of their skin.
46. N/A
47. N/A
48. When they lived in Wyoming, they did have friends that would be distant in public places.
49. Tiffany said, “People are often surprised to find out our mom is a strawberry blond, blue eyed woman.”
50. They have never attempted to hide either parent.